GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN AFTER THE APOCALYPSE
★★★★★ (A Must-See)
Director: Thom Eberhardt
1984
After a comet vaporizes most life on earth—and turns the rest into raging zombies—the future of Los Angeles is in the hands of a tough teenage girl named Reggie, and her sister. Because Night of the Comet is a movie with the twists and turns of a great rollercoaster, it gives us not one but two ass-kicking, wise-cracking heroines who are so likable they join the same roster as Sarah Conner and Ripley. If you have a girl’s night and want to watch a retro horror flick, this is The One. Night of the Comet ranks up there with the best comedic apocalypse movies of the 80s. It’s a low-budget B movie that looks nothing like a low-budget B movie thanks to stellar direction and cinematography.
The film starts with an ominous voice telling us about a strange comet that is about to crash to Earth, an event that hasn’t happened since the age of dinosaurs. Of course, every dum dum is treating this like New Years on Times Square as they wait under the stars. Me? Though I quit smoking in my 20s, I’d buy a carton of Marlboro Lights and enough beer, bacon, and grape ZotZ to fill my truck, and sit in a chair on my front lawn and wait to say, “I told you so”. I’m not a pessimist, I’m a realist.
Gee, guess what happens when a mysterious comet flies over the Earth. Everyone directly exposed either gets fried to a crisp or turned into a murderous zombie, and this includes our protagonists’ wicked stepmother who’s cheating on their military dad stationed overseas. Doris’ stepdaughters (Reggie and Sam) have found other things to do besides join the world in welcoming this celestial event. After telling Doris she should learn to close her legs, Sam is punched and winds up hiding in a backyard shed. Reggie, on the other hand, has relations with her feckless guy friend up in the projector room of a movie theater. Reggie is a practical teen who loves video games, shooting her mouth off, and reading comic books, so in a nutshell, she’s someone everyone can instantly connect with. Sam is the hair-brained cheerleader with a heart of gold and cajones the size of jackfruit. Using the training their soldier father gave Reggie, these teens go into survival mode when they discover they’re the only ones left in the city.
They’re not exactly alone. When they wisely go to the radio station after hearing what they think is a live broadcast, the girls come across a truck-driver named Hector who has chemistry with Reggie—but he’s in Sam’s sights because he might be the last guy on Earth. One of the many things I love about this film is how the script is respectful to Sam and Reggie’s needs and hopes. The girls make sure to arm themselves and take the time to go on a free shopping spree (resulting in the best fight scene in the film). They also mourn the fact that the boys at school are now cocoa powder. Our heroines behave like typical youngsters without any of the “annoying kid in horror” tropes. They think before they act, and if they do mess up it’s because of decisions any of us would have made in that situation.
That’s not to say they’re the only characters to cheer on. The movie has us fall for Hector when he can’t bring himself to shoot a little zombie boy trying to kill him. “Lucky for you I like kids,” Hector quips before he leaps out a window. Eberhardt’s script is so refreshing because it’s just so damn good-hearted.
The budget for Night of the Comet was $700,000, a measly sum for an apocalypse film. No corner was cut, but if I had to complain about anything it’s that the movie is low on zombie action and most villains die unsatisfying deaths. These issues hardly matter when you’re this entertained. If you’re looking for a feel-good film about sisterly love and lots of ammo, you can’t go wrong with the movie credited for inspiring Buffy and other girls who save the world. I love this film. The ending is as the awesome as the synth score beating to the pitter-patter of my heart.
GENRES: Apocalyptic, Diverse Characters, Feminist-Friendly, Funny, Monster/Creature
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