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BLOOD AND CHOCOLATE

A WOLF GIRL DESTINED FOR GREATNESS FALLS IN LOVE WITH A HUMAN



★★☆☆☆ (Don’t Bother)

Director: Katja von Garnier

2007



Vivian has a secret: She’s a chocolatier by day, a furry by night. The pretty young woman isn’t a werewolf, but a Loup Garou, a human/wolf hybrid whose fellow survivors now roam the streets of Romania after being killed everywhere else. Despite the safety of her large pack and “hunts” that allow her to run the woods in her true form, she’s not happy, mostly because she might be the Chosen One, a girl prophesied to marry main villain Gabriel and lead the loup garou’s to their freedom. All her problems are about to be compounded or alleviated, depending how you see it. One night, she happens upon a dashing American named Aiden as he’s drawing in an abandoned church. Their banter leaves both interested, but there are obstacles to overcome, like Gabriel declaring Aiden a threat and ordering his killing. The rest of the story deals with Vivian and Aiden strengthening their love and saving one another from the threat of Vivian’s violent friends.



Blood and Chocolate began as a little YA book in 1997, and I remember working in bookstores in the 2000s and selling quite a few copies. This tale of a supernatural girl deemed the “Chosen One” and the hunky human she falls in love with has a familiar ring to it because many other books, from Pride and Prejudice to Twilight, were birthed from the same source: Shakespeare’s play Romeo and Juliet. Star-crossed lovers or misunderstandings between good-looking people will always be romance gold, leading to decent book sales, but the one big difference between Annette Curtis Klause’s series and Stephenie Meyer’s is that the latter got a big boost from its film adaption. It didn’t help that the Blood and Chocolate film doesn’t remotely resemble the source material and doesn’t court the teen audience it should have. The screenplay has shocking changes that will make you scratch your head—most of them because the filmmakers were also responsible for Underworld and believed all material should be treated with such grittiness. Instead of the suburbs, we have a setting in the elegant and ancient city of Bucharest. Instead of going to high school, our wolfish heroine Vivian works in a chocolate shop full time. Instead of Vivian accepting a certain someone as her mate, we have the Hollywood standard ending. All the complications that made the book so popular have been traded for a Disney-fied plot, and even Team Edward could smell a fake from across a science classroom.


The movie is not helped by the poor casting of our heroine Vivian. When Agnes Bruckner is acting between two naturally good actors (Olivier Martinez and Hugh Dancy, trying their best with the script they’re given), her faults are highlighted. The blank face she carries around throughout the film is so mind-numbing, the mandatory montages of fountain frolicking and lying among flowers are made awkward by her unexpected smile. This smile is fake and uncomfortable and makes her look like she’s a hostage. People joke about Kristin Stewart’s dull performance as Bella, but you have to admit the girl’s got charisma. Most teenagers would rather be a sexy vampire than a werewolf with fleas or mange, and there’s no chance they would connect with Vivian because there’s not much of a person there. The odds were stacked against Blood and Chocolate from the beginning.



All the Shades of Vivian




Blood and Chocolate, the book and film, disappeared because the Twilight crowd didn’t embrace them as a way to pass the time before their next movie came out. Though it’s as predictable as its contemporaries and has all the required youth bait—emo music, a girl at the center of a prophecy, a handsome outsider who gets her—the lovers aren’t teens. Vivian and Adrien look and act like twenty-somethings with adult lives that no one under eighteen understands or cares about. Our heroine delivers candy by day while Adrien is an artist who travels the world to avoid his abusive father. These films are supposed to be wish fulfillment, an escape from the real world.


“MOST TEENAGERS WOULD RATHER BE A SEXY VAMPIRE THAN A WEREWOLF WITH FLEAS OR MANGE, AND THERE’S NO CHANCE THEY WOULD CONNECT WITH VIVIAN BECAUSE THERE’S NOT MUCH OF A PERSON THERE.”


The tradition and folklore of the Blood and Chocolate world is far richer than the shenanigans going on in Forks, Washington. Humans are called “meat” and the hunts are meant to be a bonding exercise and a test of loyalty. Location shots of the city are gorgeous and make you want to book a trip. This film even does a good job treating troublemakers terrorizing in a pack like the ruffians in The Lost Boys. There was so much more material here for Katja von Garnier to work with, but the direction is poor and the sexuality from the book that got it banned by parents from libraries has been turned into a tepid love story between siblings. Dancy and Bruckner have zero chemistry, and all sexual content is limited to their characters kissing in a lonely building and then emerging the next day with smiles on their faces. Aiden is not a “bad boy” like Edward or Tobias Eaton or Gale, and there is no love triangle with sides to root for. You know exactly what is going to happen the first time Vivien and Aiden lock eyes. No more, no less.


Another issue with Blood and Chocolate is that it’s dated in the worst ways. From the bad slow-motion shots to absinthe that was suddenly cool again to the sad parkour that’s supposed to make you go, “Whoaaaa! Extreeeme!”, this movie feels like 2007—and the 2000s, with a few exceptions, were not good years for horror. From the last shot, you can tell the filmmakers expected to further expand the series, but Blood and Chocolate was a failure on all fronts, and kept us from another Klause adaptation. The movie tries so hard to be many things to many people, but like a relationship, it’s not supposed to be this hard.






GENRES: Diverse Characters, Feminist-Friendly, Monster/Creature, Teens in Peril


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